Since 2006, I’ve been calling to make a yearly appointment with last years neurologist. This year something happened that I’ve never experienced with Kaiser Permanente’s Neurology group. That neurologist, I saw about 10 months ago, now has a full schedule till this coming June. Even then, I may well have to wait another month or so before seeing her.
Across the past 8 years, my then current neurologists insisted that I call in after the first of year to setup an appointment. This time something was flubbed up. The receptionist I talked with said that I should have received a card, late last year, requesting that I set things up for my next annual appointment.
I don’t remember any such thing ever showing up over all of those years. Now, I have to own that I do have a memory problem since I’m missing 4/5th of my left temporal lobe. But, I have no recall of ever being contacted before the turn of the year for an appointment. The weight of remembering that has always rested on me. My answer to the problem has been to simply setup a reminder in my iCal for that task.
So, what should I do? Should I file a complaint? Perhaps, I can just smile and let that bit of water flow under the bridge? Or then, I could, also, take it up with my neurologist when I finally see her this year.
Given the complaints I’ve dealt with across my professional years, I don’t agree with confronting my MD. This had nothing to do with her, directly. I’m also confident that the staff in that department were also doing their jobs. My being one in perhaps a few thousand patients makes me more like a straw of hay in the barn.
My choice is to do more than forgive, like I’ve been writing about for the past few weeks. I have learned that each of the neurologists I’ve seen across the past 8 years manages their time and focus of attention differently. To learn, even at a minor level, of why things play out for us is marvelous.
Perhaps the main problem in this small arena of my life is both my surgically inflicted forgetfulness and the team across those years mistakingly sees me doing better than I am. I must be careful with such since I am projecting onto this ever shifting team my sense of some not trusting me. So then, how does one go about living forgiveness in this context?